When Hema Malini said she married Dharmendra for ‘happiness’, expressed disappointment in being called ‘first lady of second marriages’
Hema Malini rarely spoke publicly about the controversy surrounding her marriage. But in her biography Hema Malini: Beyond the Dream Girl, she reflected on that turbulent time.
‘All I wanted was happiness’
Hema Malini rarely spoke publicly about the controversy surrounding her marriage. But in her biography Hema Malini: Beyond the Dream Girl, she reflected on that turbulent time, writing: “I just knew that he made me happy. And all I wanted was happiness.”
She acknowledged the unspoken judgment she felt around her: “Fingers were pointed. Accusations were flung at us. Nobody said anything in front of me, but I was not a fool. I knew they discussed me behind my back. It wasn’t easy.”
The hurt was real. The labels were harsh. And at one point, the pressure became so overwhelming that Hema Malini even considered moving to Bengaluru. But the idea dissolved once she returned to her film set and realised leaving everything behind was not the life she wanted. She chose instead to stay—with her career, her life, and her relationship.
For decades, Hema Malini and Dharmendra existed in a delicate, unconventional arrangement. She accepted that she was his “second family,” and even though they lived minutes away from Dharmendra’s first wife and children, their worlds never intersected.
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Speaking to Lehren Retro, Hema Malini articulated the emotional reality that often gets overshadowed by public perception: “Nobody wants to be like that; it happens. Automatically, what happens, you have to accept. Every woman wants a husband, children, a normal family. But somewhere, it went out of the way… I am not sulking about it. I am happy with myself. I have my two children, and I have brought them up very well.”
‘I am not a police officer who needs to keep tabs.’
In her biography, Hema Malini addressed the misconceptions people often hold about her marriage—particularly the idea that she lived in constant longing, waiting for Dharmendra to show up.
“There are people who think I am weeping at home, pining for my man. I am not a police officer who needs to keep tabs on him. He knows his duty as a father and I have never had to remind him of it. Dharam-ji still treats me like he did in the initial days.”
Hema Malini and Dharmendra’s marriage endured for 45 years, a union that weathered judgment, distance, and complexity. On November 24, the iconic actor breathed his last, leaving behind two families who were a part of his extraordinary life story.